Your insecurities make the worst of you. There have been so many times where I hear people go, “Oh, she’s pretty…but I bet she’s dumb.” or “Oh, she got an A? She probably cheated.” There are two types of jealousy: 1. The type that makes you a bully, 2. The type that makes you a better person. Maybe a better title would be: Stop putting people down because of your own insecurities….
I do think that Jealousy is natural and people feel it all the time – whether or not they are willing to admit it. In my opinion, jealousy fuels insecurities: you can be in a relationship and feel jealous, you can be jealous of someone who is smarter than you or you can be jealous that someone is better than you at a certain task.
When we are jealous of a friend, things become even more complicated. Some can dedicate their whole lives to competing with their friend: who has the higher paying job, or who has the cutest boyfriend, etc. There are so many times where I have hung out with friends who repeatedly put down others: “Oh, you’re so lucky that you are pretty and were able to get that great job.” or even, “Oh, You got an A on your test? Wow. Did you cheat?”
We fail to remember that, although good things happen to lucky people, most of the time…. those people work their asses off. Did that person get that high paying office job simply because they were pretty? Or did they put in long hours at the office. What about the friend who got an A in a very hard class? They were probably up all night studying and reading the book. We are so quick to find flaws in that person to make ourselves feel better.
Yes, I get jealous too. But, being jealous is something that you can work at and someday… overcome. Just as jealousy can be a bad trait... it can also motivate you to become a better person and to work harder. Anyone can be great. Instead of judging others or putting them down, we should ask questions and apply them to ourselves. Maybe to get a better grade in class, you can study harder; to get a better job or a higher salary, maybe we should gain the courage to ask for a raise or use our resources to find a better job. The harder we try and the more we have confidence in our self, then jealous begins to slowly go away. We begin to see how hard people work, a pretty girl does not simply get the corner office job by being pretty- she gets it by being confident and assertive.
An additional example:
I used to think that all skinny girls would eat small portions, basically starve themselves (don’t hate me) and spend all their free time working out. Honestly, I would just think that some girls were just born that way. But now, I know that is not the case. After trying to work out and lose weight, I admire many of the girls I see at the gym. They are dedicated. They eat healthy and motivate themselves to go the gym everyday. They also learn proper work out techniques and research healthy food and their calorie intake.
No need to compare yourself to others.
Love each other, and know that hard work pays off.